Simone's Kitchen

Dudefood Tuesday: Piece of Ass on a plate

Whole30 approved beef fajitas | insimoneskitchen.comI am a buttlover.
When I hear Sir Mix a Lot’s song on the radio, I can’t help but dance and shake my own booty too.
“I … like BIG butts and I cannot lie… You other brothers can’t deny..”
I like the round butt, firm booty, but mostly I like the big butts. The bigger the better for me.
Of course I am talking about cow butts, here aka the steak.
What did you dudes think then? You dirty minds!

It’s strange when you think that a piece of ass can do so much with a dude.
Throw it in the pan and one of the best smells of the world starts to fill your kitchen.
I like my steak best with handmade fries and some of that gravy that’s jampacked with flavor.
When I talk about it my mouth starts to water and I just need a steak.
Right now I got a burning fever and the only medicine is a perfectly roasted steak.


Unfortunately my favorite steak dish (with chips and gravy) is out of reach for the next thirty days, because the Misses had decided that she wanted to lose some weight. You can say she wants to shrink her own, personal steak.
And when the Misses starts a diet that means that the Dude has to thread very careful in the kitchen and especially with the things he cooks up.
When he wants to make a dish with some sugar in it or slightly too much fat, he gets a severe penalty from the Misses.
And don’t you have the guts to even look at the deepfryer or the scolding from Miss Diet Police will be like a hurricane going on a rampage.
There is a reason why hurricanes always have female names. There is even a comparison between hurricanes and women. Anybody know why?

But, diet dictatorship on the side, I still desperately want to eat a steak.
Let’s make a healthy steak, which gets the approval of the Misses and her strict reign of ‘what and what not’ to eat.
Today I make marinated steak fajitas with healthy vegetables and without the tortillas.
Almost just as delicious as my own preferred steak dish.

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Whole30 approved beef fajitas |
Steak fajitas with sauteed vegetables
Cook Time
10 mins
A nice and healthy meal of marinated beef strips with nicely cooked vegetables
Servings: 2 people
For the Fajitas
  • 400 gr rump steak
  • 1 red 1 green and 1 yellow bell pepper, sliced into thin strips
  • 2 avocados sliced into thin strips
  • 1 onion sliced into thing rings
  • 1 red chili deseeded and sliced into thin strips
  • 2 to matoes quartered
  • 1 tbsp cilantro finely chopped
For the Marinade
  • 4 cloves of garlic finely sliced or pressed with a garlic press
  • 50 ml coconut aminos the dudes who don’t have to work around a diet can use soy sauce
  • 50 ml extra virgin olive oil
  • 1 tsp chili flakes
  • 1 tsp cumin powdered
  • 2 tbsp cilantro chopped
  • 2 limes squeezed and you just need the juice
  1. Put all the ingredients for the marinade in a big bowl, mix well and add the steak. Seal the bowl with cling film and let the flavors get into the meat for about one hour. In stead of a bowl you can also use a plastic sealable bag (e.g. ziplock bag) to marinate the meat.
  2. Take a frying pan and heat it without using butter or oil and put the steak in. Don’t throw away the marinade, you’ll need it later. Cook the steak for ± 3 min on each side and then take the meat out of the pan. Wrap the steak in tin foil and let it rest for 3 to 4 minutes. Use the same pan for the vegetables. Put the bell peppers, red chili and onion in the pan and add the marinade. Cook the vegetables in about five minutes until the onion is glazed but the veggies still have some bite.
  3. Use a good meat knife and slice the steak (across the grain) into thin strips. Place the strips on a plate and put the vegetables next to the juicy meat strips. Top off the dish with the avocado and tomato and sprinkle the chopped cilantro on the dish for finish.
  4. When you are not on a diet you can serve this dish with some warm tortilla wraps.


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  1. Hahaha, that title is priceless. The kind of ass I like too. 😉 A great dish. Definitely the way I love to eat my meat.



  2. I have to admit that when I saw the title of the article today I was a bit surprised and even a little shocked, after all, women don’t usually go on about backsides like this, we avoid the topic like the plague. Then, as I begin to read down through the article its not getting any better, my opinion is just worsening. I’m thinking, what in the heck is wrong with this woman? I even get to the point of thinking, do I really want to be subscribed to a blog of a woman who is going to have postings like this? And then I see it, the name of the author, of course, now it ALL makes sense, its a man, a guest post. Only a man would be THIS stupid and go on “like an ASS” about women’s asses and comparing the dish on the stove to a woman’s anatomy. He may have tried to talk his way out of putting his foot in his mouth by saying he actually talking about the beef he’s making but he’s in too deep by now and yet he continues to go further with the whole hurricane bit. Why make that idiotic comment concerning hurricanes? Does your wife know about this “flattering” article about her? He had best get his head out of HIS ass and learn that hurricanes haven’t been named solely with female names since 1978. Beginning in 1979 they used male names also. Incidentally, the reason they had female names was due to the fact that the US Hurricane Center followed the practice of the Naval Meteorologist who followed the tradition of naming ships with women’s names. Its NOT because women are a destructive force or cause chaos or any other dumb reason. This guy needs to learn, if he wants to get along with over 50% of the planet’s population you don’t spend your time insulting them or trying and failing to give backhanded compliments and TRYING to say its cow butts you’re talking about, that’s even worse. Does this guy even have a CLUE about women and know that THE worst thing you can call (or compare) a woman to is a cow? Personally, I don’t care if you like women’s behinds or beef behinds or not. That’s TMI!! Next time you write about food, just write about the food and don’t try to be funny or witty or intelligent, that gets a man into trouble every single time.

    • Hi and thanks for your comment. The Dude Food Tuesday blogs are articles with a ‘tongue in cheek’ character. Most of the times I make a fool of men and even sometimes I cast a remark about women in the (sometimes) stupid way men tend to talk about the better species. You probably will notice that when you read the previous Dude Food blogs. If my articles would be offending already (for those who don’t appreciate my kind of humor), I think I treat men and women equally in my blogs. Thats what it is, thats what I do. Anyway, in my Dude Food articles I do. And if you think that I was trying to compare the better part of mankind to bovines; that’s probably because English is not my native language or what is in the eye of the beholder. If you want to read that comparison in my article, thats fine by me, but I think I was just writing about steak and diet.

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